Monday, October 21, 2013

The Comparison Trap

It's been a while since I've blogged. I've been busy, pregnant, and uninspired. 

Warning: You might be offended by what I have to say. I would just like to preface it by stating that I'm exhausted, and totally hormonal. I think that covers it...

After endless hours on FB, Pinterest, Instagram, and various blogs, I've come to the realization that I've become very dissatisfied with myself. I tend to get down on myself when I see people posting pictures of their perfect lives. IS THAT STUFF EVEN REAL? Who can keep their house THAT clean? Do they really eat out at fancy restaurants everyday? Is it just me or is that person ALWAYS on vacation? While I want to be happy for others and their wonderful lives, I end up feeling discouraged and as if I don't measure up. Forget about keeping up with the Jones. I'm trying to keep up with the Jones, the Smiths, and the Johnsons!

We get so busy building these so called perfect avatars of ourselves on the internet. It's easy to model ourselves into rockstars while giving people a very limited view into our world. I'm disgusted with myself for participating in it. It feels so contrived and fake. We style and re-style pictures of our lives with hopes that people will think that we live in a permanent Pinterest party. I'm tired of it.

Maybe I should start instagramming pictures of my sink filled with dirty dishes or of my kids fighting with each other. Confession- I have accomplished only a fraction of the diy projects that I pinned on Pinterest. Does that make me less of a person? Am I a terrible mom because I don't make all my meals a month in advanced and freeze them or because we don't eat organic? Should I feel bad because I don't do crafts with my kids? Just me, huh?

We love to compare the worst of ourselves with the best in others. When we play those games, we always lose.

Rachel Bohlman said it best in her MOPS article, "The Grass is Greener":
"As women, we often get caught up in looking at the mess of our own lives and comparing it to what appears to be the beauty and perfection of someone else’s life. We think their life looks better than ours. But we are looking from a distance at someone else’s life, not up close. The view of another woman’s life might not look so “green” if we get up close. Our viewpoint is so limited."

Whether we think so or not, all of us have our own special niche. God has given each of us giftings and talents. So what if my gift isn't the same as _______ who is constantly put on a pedestal? I don't have to be the best at everything. I just need to be the best version of myself and be content with that.

So it's time to be honest with myself. 
Yes, I can't do simple math in my head or play sports like ______. However, I can paint and draw. 
Yes, I don't look like Olivia Wilde or Eva Mendes. However, my husband thinks I'm beautiful. 
Yes, I don't have a job where I make six figures. However, I have more than enough.

I'm ready to start looking at myself through God's lenses, not this world's.